incendiary wit from a perpetually curious techfemme... and the crap I find on the interwebs.

this is how you say it.

the word
and it's pronounced

not nukeyuhluhr.

i'm just saying.

Home Video: a soundtrack by which
to count street lights.

i love car rides.
at night,

i love watching the street lights
run over
the hood of the car
under the moonlight
with some wonderful music
almost the same rhythm
as say,
your windshield wipers
if indeed it's raining.

this is the album cover for Home Video's
No Certain Night or Morning
and it is certainly right
for those twinights
or gloamornings.

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for fans of:
depeche mode
vhs or beta
tv on the radio
the junior boys
girl and the sea
sound team



and it's the disorder most likely to occur with a secondary diagnosis--like drug addiction.

guys, it's not just the drugs making her act in the most puzzling ways imaginable.

drugs are often a bipolar person's attempt to self-medicate.

and her behavior is not puzzling if you know what you're looking at.


and it sucks to go through this at all
let alone with everyone watching
pointing and laughing!

good luck
to everyone who's touched by this.

poetry, via viagra.

has anyone ever looked at these strange nonsensical prose poems that come in your junk mail?
here is one that came in some viagara spam today:

For any part of them we can make out
Père and Mère Chose could be in conversation
In realms of dingy gloom and deep crevasse
marked with a dark stroke from the left, encroached
Centimeters—that the height of the canvas
Only a fox whose den I cannot find.
Like an old soldier, wakeful, in his tent!
In a single floral stroke,
Comes up with as a means to its own end.
Life, or only joy, that stands out
and preening, dancing on the basepaths,
Among us, only Alberti, then Sangallo,
To pick up even the quickening of wind
To a higher level of appearance.
That desire has ever built, have approached
for a few weeks, statistics won't seem
Reshaping magnified, each risen flake
Before those virile women!


they come in all the spam emails I've ever gotten.
is there a reason for them?
like, a meta-tag kind of reason?
that sort of thing?
or is it just a way to use ten euphemisms for erections
just so the people sending the emails can entertain themselves?


jean paul sartre's "the gaze," anyone?

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jps = hunk

why is it
that everyone says
oh i finally BROKE DOWN
and joined
"insert social network of choice here"

what is so wrong with being available to others?
i don't understand the reticence to uninhibited self promotion.

are we seriously still pretending
we don't care what others think?

because i care.
i care a lot.
but i don't see this as a personal fault.

i carefully construct my persona
online and elsewhere
this does not mutually exclude
my ability to love and attend to others
and their feelings.
it really is possible to balance a love/sense of self
and a love/sense for others.

so stop acting like you don't care!
because you probably do!

and i love you anyway gosh darnit!

the case for under-functionality and one painfully terrible pun involving meat.

so these days
all the companies are all like
on our phones we've got
texts pix movies games internets musics!
and i'm all like
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am i the only person that doesn't want to look
at the internet in a space that is 3"x3"?

i like having a phone that is just a phone.
a 17" computer just for the internet.
an iPod that just plays music.
an Xbox that is only for games.
a DVD player for movies.

i doubt i will ever buy an iPhone.
if i did, i'd only make calls on it!
i am definitely a Macophile,
but it makes no sense to me.
it does not speak to me.
because separation appeals to me.

it's sort of like
when i eat dinner
i don't swirl all the food together in one big mess
i like beef in one corner
taters in another
veggies in yet another.

so there you have it.
separation of starch and steak,
a.k.a. stop combining EVERYTHING!
some things are better served alone.

a series of cohesions.

the internet is a funny thing,
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and according to senator ted stevens, it's also a series of tubes.

but like anything invented by people it is a multifaceted thing:

bad, good, other.

online bullying; pedophiles having access to children and taking advantage of it; some would say pornography. i would half kid and lament the breakdown of the knowledge of grammar and spelling for the sake of speed and convenience, although i do love a good LOL every once in awhile.

others would say pornography;
amazon.com's free super saver shipping,
the expression of alternate voices and views,
and for the purpose of this post,
i will highlight internet-based COHESION.


but back to cohesion.

people can connect easily in this digital world,
around the common and the obscure.

sports fans.
political causes.
support groups.
followers of a religion.
even lolcats!:
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(PostSecret is an ongoing community art project
where people mail in their secrets anonymously on one side of a homemade postcard.)
then there's 4chan.:
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but you know what one of the strongest pulls comes from?


i have personally been moved to tears at a concert,
turned to my right and left, and seen the exact same thing.
i'd have confidence that i could go online
and at least fourteen other people would have also had my experience.

so again, whether good, bad, or other:
the internet allows for greater access to people (freaks, normal, other)
just like you
who cry at concerts
laugh at lolcats
and love a good postsecret.

i sure would love a good social network whose locus is music, though.

a question from the godhead:
what would radiohead do?

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many people agree that radiohead
is as close to Godliness as a band can be.
some people don't agree at all.

whether the lyrics, the syncopation,
thom yorke's voice, or the instrumentation,
there is something either magical
or irritating about them.

people adore them or hate them.
which is often the way people see God.
but, as most would admit
nay or yay
like God,
there is nothing quite like them.

but for now,
profundity aside,
this post is only about radiohead,
so let me make one thing clear:


and today, i have come to respect them even more.

i heard from a good friend
that they are selling their new album,
in rainbows,
straight from the website
with no outside regulation
no label
starting october 10th as a drm-free download.
you may also purchase a boxed set,
which begins shipping in december.

so i go to the website to buy the download,
get to the pay page and see this:

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

the price is blank.

we decide what to pay for this album.

which begs the obvious question:

what do you pay the artist,
when it goes directly to them,
for the music that you love so deeply?
what is it worth to you?

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is this the future of music?
are they the saviors or harbingers
of the music industry that is dying at your feet?
and what do you think about THAT?

something old, something new,
something poe, something true.

i spent many days alone in my room when i was younger,
listening to poe.
i'm really not sure what it was,
but she always haunted me.
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even as my music taste changes, i remember her fondly.

so today, when i pulled out my CDs for the first time
in a billion years
because they are almost like dinosaurs now
so antiquated are they
compared to those spry, young mp3s
'cause i needed to re-burn some of my favorites
since iTunes
insists on losing my music files
which makes me
and i consider myself computer literate
and i have no idea why it does this inane thing to me
if anyone can tell me
i would appreciate it.

it's a good thing that i back up my stuff.

so anyway.
turns out poe released a new album in 2000 and i didn't know about it.
wtf, i know.
i hope it's great.
i haven't found out.
because of more iTunes difficulties.
*wrings hands.*

i'm one of the few people who still buys their music on iTunes.
i am not sure why
but i suppose i like doing things legally
and having it synch up with my iPod
and not having to deal with torrents and guilt complexes
i don't know.
there has to be a better solution people!
i am not sure it's streaming though
i really like my music to be portable
i like ownership.
i just do.

who can offer me what i want?
am i missing something?
a cheaper, more reliable
more directly beneficial to the artist
i will wait until my new poe downloads
and i will still enjoy it
even if i am down ten dollars.